A guide to the worlds most recognised sex position.
The greatest number in human history. Not because it’s the best sex position. Oh no. In fact, it’s well known by many to be a bit awkward, clumsy, tricky and just a lot. We celebrate these fabulous digits because it's the one number that celebrates sex.
As one of the most well-known and well-heckled positions in the sex book, it’s also the perfect example of sex involving more than simple penetration. It widens our definition of how we give and receive pleasure and with a bit of tweaking, can be a super fun way to experience your own and your partner's body. So let’s get into it.
The basics.
Lucky number 69. It involves two bodies, reversed or facing different directions, giving head and/or genital stimulation with either the hand, mouth or toys, at the same time. Think of it like jacked oral sex, without the expectation or end goal of penetration - a pleasure-based experience that is as much about giving as it is receiving.
You don’t have to be a human plank.
The standard 69 involves one person hovering or straddling their partner's face. Note, you do not have to perform feats of enduring human strength to enjoy this position. Consider how your body experiences the most pleasure - would it be helpful to lie on your side? Or to rest on a prop, pillow or sex wedge for support? Taking the physical load off may help you focus on your and your partner’s pleasure.
Get off the goal wagon.
69, like all sex positions, is best when it isn't singularly focus on orgasm, climax or an end result. It’s a tricky position - one that can involve a lot of sensory processing. It may be helpful to consider who this is for and what pleasure is present - i.e. how does it feel when you have your face between your partner’s legs (a massive turn on for many!), or what pleasure is present from having your bodies close and touching? What feels good when you focus on receiving, but also what feels good when you’re giving? Can you embrace the fact that you might not orgasm, but that it’s a playful way to redefine sex (beyond just penetration) and access pleasure from new highly sensitive angles?
It’s a lot.
Giving and receiving pleasure at once can be overwhelming for some. If the pressure starts to build, or you’re feeling a little too much, take a pause and check in with your partner. You can take it slower, bring awareness back to the body or switch positions if it feels right. Have your tool kit at the ready; lube, toys or well timed breaks, with a reminder to remove any pressure for perfection or orgasmic excellence and a gentle encouragement to have fun with it.
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